| 1. | Homer: Bart, with $10,000 we’d be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like…love! | 3 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 2. | Homer: I’m normally not a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me, Superman. | 3 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 3. | Homer: Oh, everything looks bad if you remember it. | 3 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 4. | Homer: Old people don’t need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use. | 3 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 5. | Apu: Please do not offer my god a peanut. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 6. | Apu: Yes! I am a citizen! Now which way to the welfare office? I’m kidding, I’m kidding. I work, I work. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 7. | Barney: Aaah! Natural light! Get it off me! Get it off me! | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 8. | Barney: Jesus must be spinning in his grave! | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 9. | Bill Gates: I didn’t get rich by signing checks. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 10. | Chief Wiggum: Can’t you people take the law into your own hands? I mean, we can’t be policing the entire city! | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 11. | Chief Wiggum: Fat Tony is a cancer on this fair city! He is the cancer and I am the…uh…what cures cancer? | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 12. | Chief Wiggum: I hope this has taught you kids a lesson: kids never learn. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 13. | Chief Wiggum: Uh, no, you got the wrong number. This is 9-1…2. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 14. | Comic Book Guy: But, Aquaman, you cannot marry a woman without gills. You’re from two different worlds… Oh, I’ve wasted my life. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 15. | Comic Book Guy: Last night’s “Itchy and Scratchy Show” was, without a doubt, the worst episode *ever.* Rest assured, I was on the Internet within minutes, registering my disgust throughout the world. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 16. | Comic Book Guy: Oh, loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 17. | Comic Book Guy: The Internet King? I wonder if he could provide faster nudity… | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 18. | Comic Book Guy: Your questions have become more redundant and annoying than the last three “Highlander” movies. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 19. | Duffman: Duffman can’t breathe! OH NO! | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 20. | Frink: Brace yourselves gentlemen. According to the gas chromatograph, the secret ingredient is… Love!? Who’s been screwing with this thing? | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 21. | Grandpa Simpson: Dear Mr. President, There are too many states nowadays. Please, eliminate three. P.S. I am not a crackpot. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 22. | Hans Moleman: I was saying “Boo-urns.” | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 23. | Homer: A woman is a lot like a refrigerator. Six feet tall, 300 pounds…it makes ice. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 24. | Homer: Donuts. Is there anything they can’t do? | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 25. | Homer: D’oh. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 26. | Homer: Fame was like a drug. But what was even more like a drug were the drugs. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 27. | Homer: He didn’t give you gay, did he? Did he?! | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 28. | Homer: Here’s to alcohol, the cause of — and solution to — all life’s problems. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 29. | Homer: Homer no function beer well without. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 30. | Homer: I’m going to the back seat of my car, with the woman I love, and I won’t be back for ten minutes! | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 31. | Homer: Kids, kids. I’m not going to die. That only happens to bad people. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 32. | Homer: Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 33. | Homer: Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 34. | Homer: Oh, so they have Internet on computers now! | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
| 35. | Homer: Save me, Jeebus. | 2 | ↑ | ↓ |
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